When is the right time?

 

Hi everyone! Just have been sitting and talking to my eldest daughter about right timing: when is the right time to start making changes in your life? When is the right time to turn everything upside down and start something new, something that you've been desiring for a long while? When is the right time to have a baby? When is the right time to change your career?

Well, guess what? The answer is NEVER! It is never the right time! Ha! You would say 'I didn't expect this kind of answer!' Then, read on..

"You are what you have been and you will be what you do now" Buddha

Do you wake up in the morning and feel: 'Wow, today is the DAY! Today is the day of opportunities and it will bring me some amazing things, it will teach me new tricks'?
OR, do you wake up with the thoughts: 'Ugh, another day... I just don't know to get through today. I wish it was.....' and here you fill in the dots with nouns like Friday, Saturday, Sunday, holiday, day off, summer, etc.
Wishing for something else.

A friend of mine changed my thinking simply by being totally inactive and depressed. Over the years, everytime we spoke, she told me how fat she is, how there is absolutely no hope for anything. There will never be a good job, her son will always stay impossible to deal with, her husband will always remain more childish than her son, her health is never going to be better.
She even mentioned a few times 'I wish, I would just die...'

For every solution she would dispatch at least 2-3 contra-solutions, or firm explanations WHY it is not possible.

And so that's where I started thinking differently about my own life:

If not now then when?







I have certain aspirations and I know that I want to use them to change my life. NOW, today! If I don't take an action now, what will change tomorrow? The problems will stay as they are, except, maybe they will annoy me more, make me depressed, angry.

 

So when is the right time? Some of you may heard me before elaborating on this subject.

 

When is the right time, for example, to have a baby?

Before University? No, of course not. Too young and you need to study.

After University? No, it's time to use your diploma and get into a job.

In the middle of your career? No, it's time when you're earning good money. And so you want to travel around the world. Without the burden of dragging children along with you.

When you are earning great money and your career is going really well? Well... no... society really appreciates you now as a professional and leaving the stage now might hurt the reputation..

 

And then, before you know it, you are about 40 years old, you found the right man and you want to have children. There is only one problem: it's not easy to fall pregnant anymore. The body isn't young and isn't performing its functions as perfectly as before. That's when you start panicking, trying to fix the problem with external solutions: IVF, surrogate or adopting.

Some get more lucky then the others: one of these solutions works. A baby is born and its time to enjoy parenthood. But now you have less time left of your life to enjoy your child and the energy levels are not as they used to be.

 

The above example works similarly in regard to other parts of your life.

So before it's too late, realise your aspirations and make that small change to your life today. Don't be addicted to 'tomorrow'. There will never be the right time.

If not now, then when?

Positive Thinking - Part II

Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching?

Remember when you saw somebody on a street or at your gym who was smiling happily to themselves? Didn’t you just feel a little jealous, asking yourself: ‘What does she has to smile about? Why does she feel so good?’

This is your first “a-ha!” moment! Maybe it does not sound too nice but do it yourself, smile in such way so others feel jealous of you being so happy!

To many women it would be a very familiar exercise. You’ve done it dozens of times when, for example, thinking of your ex and wishing to make him jealous.. If only he could see you know, looking so stylish, successful, happy and careless! You know the feeling? If yes, then go on, do it: put that light, happy smile on your face and let others guess: ‘Why does she look so happy?’

The Law of Attraction

No, this is not the law how to attract the opposite sex. :)
According to About.com “The theory behind the Law of Attraction is that we create our own realities. We attract things we want and we also attract things we don't want. We attract the people in our lives and various situations through our thoughts and feelings.
When our beliefs are limited, we attract limited wealth and compromise our well-being. When we believe anything is possible, the sky's the limit.”

As human beings, we tend to search for happiness, wealth, success and abundance anywhere else but not in ourselves. We tend to blame others in our misfortunes: parents, partners, and - the most popular – circumstances! What could be easier? Circumstances, that’s it! But have you thought WHO creates these circumstances? Using the power of your own positive thought, you can access the endless intellect and endless powers from within yourself. Your prevailing thoughts and feelings rule and create your Life.

If your prevailing thoughts are about how to get healthy, financially stable, about love and expressing yourself freely and independently, you WILL get it all, eventually. And the opposite: if you think that there is no way out, that you will probably stay poor for the rest of your life and all the good things in life avoid you, it is most likely that it WILL be the case.

Remember: your thought is constructive. Your quality of life is the product of your subconscious and conscious thinking.

ACTION!

-          What feelings and emotions are triggered by your negative thoughts?
-          Understand the connection, then stop and try to see it from a different angle.
-          Write a list of the things you want from your life or create a collage with ideas and images that matter
-          Try to see the opportunities
-          Replace the negative thoughts with positive vision of what you want to achieve
-            Positive talk and affirmations: I am an amazingly clever person and I know I can get anything I wish for! I know the way!

And good luck, you are totally worth it!

The Power of Positive Thinking

How can I start Thinking Positively?

So you need to overcome yet another challenge in your life: difficult situation, anger, feeling indifferent, lost?

OK, let’s start with the following questions you can ask yourself:
-          What was the last situation when Thinking Positively helped you?
-          Who were the people involved?
-          What role did you play?
-          How the Positive Thinking changed the outcome of that situation?
-          How did you feel about it?

Remember that day when you felt amazingly happy? What were your emotions and feelings about the world around you? About the people around you? I bet, you didn’t really care about some grumpy faces around you, you felt as the whole world is on your side, all for you!

Everything starts with a thought. Being positive and happy is the state of your OWN mind. Being negative and unhappy is again the state of your OWN mind.

I know one family who over the years accepted the Power of Positive Thinking. When you listen to them, their speech is full of such words and phrases as ‘Thank you’, ‘Awesome’, ‘Wonderful’, ‘Amazing’, ‘That’s great’! When you look at them, their faces are always shining with the non-faked, genuine, wide smile. They laugh a lot… I was surprised to learn that they, actually, have problems. As any other family, if not more. Their “new” second-hand car got broken in the middle of the nowhere, there will be no refund from the seller. All three of them in the family have encountered serious health problems that will require operations and hospital time, left alone the huge bills. Their office space has got a major underfloor leakage, destroying important documents and so on…

And so I asked them: considering all of the above, why are you still smiling and looking positive?

The answer was: If we will start to dwell on our problems now, we will acquire the negative state of mind. Negativity is hardly capable of bringing anything amazing in people’s life. We know we are experiencing certain problems right now but we are also aware of the wonderful things ahead of us, we have The Power of Belief!

Bible says: "Anything is possible if a person believes." Mark 9:23

If you believe in a miracle, if you trust that your life has got something amazing in storage for you, it will inevitably happen.

Feel special!

Positive affirmation for today: I am a live magnet that attracts positivity and success. I know, my life is amazing and it brings me wonderful people and experiences. Everything in this Universe is for my happiness! Birds are singing in the dawn – it’s especially for me! Green traffic lights all along the way to work – it was arranged for me especially! I received 3 Smiles from the total strangers – it is definitely for me, to make me feel good and Positive! But don’t forget to answer back with the same open, wide Smile.

Check, how your perception of the world around changes instantly. Enjoy it J

P.S. And look out for the next part on this topic tomorrow! There will be more amazing revelations!

These will help you stay focused on your DREAM

Quotes to help you stay focused on your DREAM

Life is like a staircase: you have to go up each stair to reach the top.

Love not what you are, but what you may become.
Miguel de Cervantes

"I have a train ticket for Constantinople. But I may stop in Vienna or get off in Budapest . . . that depends purely on chance”

I like the dreams of the future better than the history of the past.
Patrick Henry

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.
Eleanor Roosevelt

Heaven never helps the man who will not act.
Sophocles

The ability to convert ideas to things is the secret to outward success.
Henry Ward Beecher

The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen.
Frank Loyd Wright

改善 (kaizen = continuous change)

Goal Setting

Before you start putting your Goals together, you need to shift your Paradigm.

Stop saying to yourself: “What’s wrong with me? Oh, I don’t know if I will succeed….” The self-talk always guides us. We programme ourselves. We talk ourselves into failure or success.

So start right now with telling yourself how amazing and clever you are, how exciting it will be to set your new Goals, to realise your Dream, and this exercise will change your life and life of your beloved ones!

All powerful and successful people are Goal orientated. They are focused on achieving their Goals every single day.

“Realize what you really want. It stops you from chasing butterflies

and puts you to work digging gold.”

William Moulton Marsden

Step 1.          Create a very strong, powerful desire. What do you want to achieve? What are your 3 most desired pictures of the Future. Do you want to live in another country, do you want to be an amazing business lady and have your own offices with employees? Do you see yourself travelling the world with your partner?

 If you want something for long enough and hard enough, you will eventually achieve it.

 

Step 2.          Imagine yourself there, where you wish to be, whom you wish to be. Visualise the littlest details, don’t be shy. For instance, day dream how you live by the sea, or go to a fancy restaurant with your partner, or you step out of your beautiful red car (all nice and slim) and with authority walk into your offices… employees are working hard. When you create a vivid picture in your mind and draw the littlest details, the desire, the Dream becomes realistic. It is almost like you are building a path, a bridge to a place where you want to be.

 Step 3.        Get yourself in the right mindset:

-                   Imagine you have a magic wand. It gives you the amazing infinite powers to achieve anything you want. You are strong, clever and powerful and you know where you’re going!

-               Don’t blame other people and circumstances for your current situation; you are what you are only because of your own actions, you are solely responsible for your today’s circumstances and quality of life;

-                   Instead of thinking what you DON’T like about where you are today and what you DON’T want, concentrate on what you want from your future;

-                   Trust your Intuition. There will be plenty of sceptics along the way, who will keep saying to you: ‘Come on, this is ridiculous! Come back to reality, just live the life you live now, work harder, save money, it will all be better!’ Yes, ok, let them say what they want. But by no means let the scepticism seed into your heart and soul. Continue to believe in the ‘Amazing you’ and trust that you know where you’re going, you know you can achieve it.

Step 4.        Have a Strategic Thinking or an ‘honesty session’: sit down, take a piece of paper and absolutely honestly list all the steps in between Current You and You at your Dream Destination.

Evaluate your current situation. Example: This is where I am now. How far do I need to go and what direction to reach my Ultimate Goal?

Put a list of 20 things you know you should be doing. Example: Do I need to do more marketing now (even if I dislike it) in order to get more clients and keep the old ones? Do I need to stop smoking so I can work out better?

Do complete skills analysis. Example of questions to ask yourself: Do you need to learn the basics of the Effective Speech & Presentation in order to be more professional? Do I need to learn the Basic of the Accounting?

Look carefully at the steps you wrote. Think, prioritise. Your Dream, your Biggest Goal might be beautiful but it does not mean that you will like all the steps you will have to make in order to get there. Remember, be honest and realistic.

            If you find it too painful to plan from Current You to Your Dream Destination, try the Projection from the Future. Here you are, successful, happy and, of course, very wise (otherwise how you would have gotten to your Dream Destination?). You know better. So what were those steps you took in order to get to your Success, to your Dream?

 Step 5.        Start working toward your Goal.

-          Work out the Systems that will make your life easier and your work more productive.

-          Be consistent with your promises and actions. A little trick for like yourself more: Under-promise and Over-deliver. Satisfaction guaranteed!

-          Discipline yourself: write plans, tick off what’s done, keep yourself on track by positive self-talk. You can do it, totally and absolutely!

Always remember to measure your progress and re-evaluate the initial Plan, if needed. Life constantly changes, so you need to be flexible to adapt your plans accordingly without shifting away from the major Goal.

Acknowledge the problem, find the solution

We are women. What it means is that we can fix any problem under the sun. Alone, by ourselves!

Right? Your baby is growing up, and it’s time to sort out childcare? Not a problem! And so you run around for a number of days in a row, collecting all the possible information about childcare centres in your area, calling them on the phone, going in to personally check them out. In the few days, you are quite satisfied with the result: you found a great Centre with amazing teachers and activities, and your baby will start attending soon! You proudly inform your husband.

Meanwhile, as you were totally pre-occupied with the chase of best care for your little one, your business started to suffer a little. Clients have not received their answers on time; the quality of your response was not of the usual standard. A few major emails have piled up in your Inbox and eagerly waiting to be sorted. But that’s ok, because you can stay up late for a few nights and sort it all out.

All good. But when you least expect it, your baby gets sick: temperature, cough, throwing up at night, and all that jazz… Well, you know how it is! As a wonderful mother, you heroically stay up all night, worried terribly, listening to every breath and cough.

If you are studying at the same time and trying to read some materials that relate to your career and business, then you ARE, indeed, a very busy woman.

Yes, it happens to all of us. And if your starting to feel that you are spreading yourself too thinly, that you are not really succeeding in any of the above areas, then it’s time to think. It’s time to acknowledge the problem before you will start to be too irritable, depressed and surrounded with non-accomplished matters.

Stop, look around and acknowledge: where is the problem?

Ø  Have you taken on too many assignments? Babies, work, business, studies, etc?…

Ø  Do you feel your house is too messy and it annoys you?

Ø  You don’t know where to start, everything seems so important! So you are just jumping from one thing to another, without accomplishing anything.

Ø  Instead of looking tidy, stunning and well looked after, you see this reflection in the mirror of permanent pony tail, tired eyes and super-concentration?

And the solutions:

Ø  Could you hire an Assistant for your business to perform simple secretarial tasks so you can concentrate on more complex, professional issues? You will be amazed how much you will progress when you have someone working for you couple of hours a day, about 2-3 days a week!

Ø  Can the housework be more structured? For example: I’m doing washing only twice a week. Mess annoys you? Well, choose the Kaizen way: it means do a little bit here and there. Believe it or not, 2 minutes of wiping the floor with wet paper towel or 2 minutes of sorting the washing pile per work day will, actually, make your life easier and more relaxed. Simply because it will be a bit cleaner and tidier after these 2 minutes!

Ø  Can you delegate? Can your husband, your mum, mother-in-law look after your baby and your castle (your home that is)? Of course, you will need to put up with the fact that they will be doing it THEIR way. But sometimes you just need to let go of total control..

Ø  I have a simple tool to fight with the notorious jumping from one thing to another, not being able to prioritise and concentrate: you just discipline yourself. Just like you would do with your child. Don’t be embarrassed to talk to yourself: ‘Sit, finish this first. I know, now you want to jump onto the accounts and check the situation there.. but NO, first you will finish writing this email!’
By all means, do pre-PLAN your next day in advance, as boring as it may sound. The next morning, when you get up, look at the plan you’ve written the night before, arm yourself with a pen and highlighter and go strictly by the PLAN, ticking off and highlighting tasks off the list as you go.

 Yes, restructuring does take time. The change in you won't happen overnight. Keep your feelings and expectations on the positive level, believe in yourself: YOU CAN DO IT! And don't be afraid to take those little baby steps towards the better life.

What we fear and how to resolve it

As women, as young mothers who do not wish to give up on their business or their role as proper mothers, we do have out fears.

I feel like I am not giving enough quality time to my babies. I wish I was a better Mummy!
I feel that my business is suffering because I am not in the position to devote as much time to it as needed. I'm losing my clients, my niche..
I feel that my husband is losing his patience.. He cannot recall when was the last time we were spontaneous or passionate.

Sounds like you?
Well, before you you get too upset that 'nothing works out', see this important formula of success that came to me not-the-easy-way:

Aknowledge your problem - Realise your DREAM - Set your Goals - Manage your Time Effectively - Get the Power of Belief - Apply the Law of Attraction -

Use your Power of Control

There will be a special chapter written on each of the parts of this Formula. You will be able to experience it straight away, it works as Magic!